One fateful night last year, I sat down with my computer and created this blog. My vision was to write commentary on things that I saw and experienced as a quiet college student. For me however, there was an elephant in the room—my anxiety.
adventuresofshygirl became my journal and my safe space. I’ve always been completely honest with my posts and try my best not to sugar coat anything. What I write about is deeply personal and I’ve accepted the risks of this. I know that this blog is public, that anyone in the world can see and read it. But I don’t care. By writing about everything that I’m going through, I’m set free. By writing about embarrassing moments and difficult times, I took the power away from them. Doing so allows me to face my demons, and recognize that, yeah it happened and yes it sucks but I’ve gotten through it and I’m not afraid or ashamed.
Many people may ask why I don’t just keep a private journal and there are two simple answers—I can never keep one consistently and these experiences that I share help others. I never would have thought that my blog would be helping others. However, I’ve received kind notes from people of all walks of life telling me their story and letting me know that reading through my blog has helped them. When the naysayers start to get to me, this is what I remember. The knowledge that there are people out there who feel less isolated because of my blog is what keeps me pushing forward.
Lately, I’ve been feeling out of sorts. My anxiety and depression have been worse and none of my usual coping mechanisms have been working. A lot has been happening that I want to share my insights on but I’ve got to be careful.
The aim of this blog and the sharing of experiences has never been to hurt and/or shame others. Something that I often do is write while I’m going through a tough situation that I don’t know how to handle and/or fix. This is good and bad. Good: It’s helps me to calm down and gives me clarity. The bad: I’m overwhelmed and emotional therefore I haven’t fully put everything into perspective.
I don’t know what the future will bring for me or this blog but I’m incredibly thankful for the support I’ve received in the past year and I can’t wait to see what happens next.
Until next time,